June 11 Friday Farming Update (Gophers!)

It seems like we've had a really wet, rainy spring. Or snowy spring. Because it's snowing big, white fluffy flakes as I write this.

(Yes, yes I said SNOW. Which is a spectacularly bull shit thing to expect to be on the ground in June!)

Which brings me to the overall photo of our house. Can you still see only the Idaho Vandals school colors in this? Sigh... never let me pick paint colors. (I-D-A-H-O!!!). BUT, notice the (free) boulevard tree? I'm already trying to figure out how I can string Christmas lights on it this winter without the extension cord being chewed up by a snowblower...

So, lets do this thing.

The good:
The overall garden and my intention to garden. I still want to eat yummy fresh veggies from our garden!

Onions!

Carrots!

Sweet Peas!

The okay:

Corn  starts, waiting to be transplanted until after I can gopher-proof the garden (see below).

Other veggie starts, including zucchini plants with blossoms on them!

And more flower starts. The sweet pea starts (I know, I love them, I can't stop) are for a present to some friends. More zinnias and larkspur too. I'll post about other flowers in our landscaping this weekend.

Tomato starts, in elevated pots (see again: goddamned gophers)!

More tomato starts, in former tree pots half buried in the front yard (idea totally stolen from a friend in Fort Benton. I think it keeps front-yard veggies looking a little more neat and tidy):

The bad:

The gophers. No, seriously.  I swear in conversation when discussing these pests, and since my mom reads this blog, we'll abreviate for the next few paragraphs. Instead of writing out "the motherfucking gophers" every time, I'll just write MFingGophers, deal?

Anyway, I used this treatment on Monday and Tuesday that looks like fertilizer, and when it gets wet it puts off a smell that is offensive to MFingGophers (I can't smell anything). I totally thought it was working. I even planted a squash transplant in the garden as an experiment. The squash plant is fine, but the pepper plant in an elevated bucket next to the tomatoes was munched on, see:

Also, my asparagus was coming through, finally. You're not supposed to pick it for the first two years, to allow the plant to further establish itself. Welp... apparently asparagus is delicious to the MFingGophers. MFers! This is all that currently remains (I need to fill in the pit a little more):

So friends, tell me how to handle the MFingGophers? I tried an eastern Montana suggestion tonight. Bubble gum. Yep. Bubble gum. The MFingGophers can't digest it and they... uh, get backed up? (sorry, graphic). A couple of EMont friends swear by this.

Again, I can't shoot the MFingGophers, because their MFingGopher holes are actually on the land of a Christian School. Good headline, bad for Courtney's reputation.

Am I going to have to make DJ build a gopher fence from chicken wire?